Thumbnail: Great. I love the picture you chose and the font.
Video: Probably could have been more cuts. there was a lot of boring time spent collecting things. Also for the first few minutes I didn't realize that you had any game audio in the video cause the music is pretty dominant. Having the music in the foreground is probably still good since you don't have commentary, but maybe try and time the edits and action with the flow of the music.
Title: Good. A little misleading with the "First Experience" part. That gives the viewer an expectation of commentary usually, so you might lose some retention there.
Pretty good video overall, but honestly the 2nd half is where it's at cause that's where all the action is. You might lose a lot of viewers early on because of how long and slow the first half is. My crew just started talking about the idea of playing this, so I'm excited to do some of this myself!
I'm starting to get bored here.
Nothing important seems to be happening here, so you maybe should have just edited it out.
So there were some parts where it didn't seem like anything was happening (like looting or when you were dropping), so you should probably edit some of that stuff out. Also since the title talked about this being your first experience, maybe you could have kind of progressed the video with some kind of narrative based around that. Off the top of my head, just basic text screens like 'I used to suck,' and then a clip of you dying, followed by a, '...then I got better,' followed by you winning a fight. Also if you don't want to use your voice, consider flashing text on the screen. It's amazing how text can add personality like with a smiley face :)
Great thumbnail! One thing that annoyed me was that the game music and the background music were overlapping at least in the beginning. I found the title a little bit too long. You should have cut the gameplay more, there were too many not very interesting events included in the video. The audio turned suddenly too loud at 3 min stamp, I don't know why just not keep it as it was at the beginning. There was barely anything that would have kept me watching because it was uncut and no commentary was included.
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